[Lions] a few jokes to cheer you up this morning

[Alex Brooks]

>>>A momma asked her ten-year-old son if he knew about the birds and the 
>>>bees.
>>>
>>>"I don't want to know!" the child said, bursting into tears.
>>>
>>>Confused, the mother asked her son what was wrong.
>>>
>>>"Oh Mom," he sobbed, "at age six I got the 'there's no Santa' speech.
>>>
>>>At age seven I got the 'there's no Easter Bunny' speech.
>>>
>>>Then at age 8 you hit me with the 'there's no Tooth Fairy' speech!
>>>
>>>If you're going to tell me that grown-ups don't really have sex, I've got
>>>nothing left to live for!"
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>Success is...
>>>
>>>At age 4 success is not peeing in your pants.
>>>At age 12 success is having friends.
>>>At age 16 success is having a drivers license.
>>>At age 20 success is having sex.
>>>At age 35 success is having money.
>>>At age 50 success is having money.
>>>At age 60 success is having sex.
>>>At age 70 success is having a drivers license.
>>>At age 75 success is having friends.
>>>At age 80 success is not peeing in your pants.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>A woman and her husband interrupted their vacation to go to the
>>>dentist. "I want a tooth pulled, and I don't want any pain killers
>>>because I'm in a big hurry," the woman said. " Just extract the
>>>tooth as quickly as possible, and we'll be on our way."
>>>
>>>The dentist was quite impressed. "You're certainly a courageous
>>>woman," he said. "Which tooth is it?"
>>>
>>>The woman turned to her husband and said, "Show him your
>>>tooth, dear."

Alexander Brooks
Craigie Taylor International
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