[Lions] (no subject)

[Alex Brooks]

Nearly peed my pants meeself when I read these......absolute class.


The following are GENUINE MSG's from a message board set up on the internet
to honour Her
Majsety Queen Elizabeth, the Queen Mother.

> "I think that the Queen Mum and Princess Diana are our
> very own Twin Trade Towers. At last we can look the people of New York
> in the face".
> L.Ward, Mansfield.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "When Diana died I swore I would never smile again, but eventually I
> did.
> Now the Queen Mum has gone I cannot image that I will ever smile for
> the
> rest of my life, but I will probably break that one too".
> A.Christie,Hendon.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "She was one of the old school, all the remaining royals are shit"
> J.Clement. Grantham.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "I thought she would never die, she has let us all down very badly"
> D.Holmes, Somerset.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "She was a trooper and she never gave up. I remember one time she was
> visiting a school and I asked her if she would like to make a visit to
> the
> cloakroom before she left. 'No' she replied, 'I didn't give in to the
> Nazisand I won't give in to the bladder'. That's how she was, a
> fighter, who refused to be beaten by anything. She pissed herself
> later
> though, it was sickening".
> B. Forrester, North Yorkshire.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "She was a marvelous woman, and a wonderful lover". L. J.Worthington,
> Penrith.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "I am absolutely devastated, at least we could have got the dayoff".
> S.Wilson, Bristol.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "How refreshing to be able to mourn the death of a member of the Royal
> family without being accused of being homosexual".
> J. Fletcher, High Wycombe.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "Her death should act as a warning to others who think it is cool to
> experiment with drugs".
> E. Franks, Cheshire.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "On behalf on all blacks, I send the sincerest condolences".
> T.Watson, Ilford.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "Perhaps if we automated her old golf buggy it could still drive
> around The
> Mall on its own and bring pleasure to the tourists".
> Y. Howell, Slough.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "Once again the Queen is not upset enough for my liking, the woman
> should
> have a bit more compassion, how would she feel if it was her mother?"
> W.Waugh, Richmond.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "It is such a loss, God has shat on our heads".
> K. O'Neil, Inverness.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "I am sure the Queen Mum will not let this setback put an end to her
> public
> duties".
> N. Wallace, Swansea.
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> "I hold Princess Margaret in no small way responsible for this
> terrible
> event"
> E. Thompson, West Lothian.
> ---------------------------------------------------------
>
> "Bomb Iraq for us Tony, its the only thing that will make us feel
> better"
> P.McGregor, Southampton.
> ---------------------------------------------------------
> "We must do all we can, send blankets, food parcels,
> jumpers, anything to help these brave souls who are queuing up to walk
> past
> her coffin".
> R. Thompson, Bath.
> ---------------------------------------------------------
> "I have been unable to masturbate for five days, and will not do so
> again
> until her majesty is buried"
> E. Gorman, Derbyshire.
> ---------------------------------------------------------
> "Good God, who is next, Geri Halliwell?".
> R. Combes,
> Romford.
> ---------------------------------------------------------
> "No matter how she felt, no matter the situation, she always wore a
> smile.
> Just like a retard"
> G. Hollins, East Sussex.

Alexander Brooks
Craigie Taylor International
Direct Line: 01483 209832
Mobile: 07870 185690
Fax: 01483 203600
www.craigietaylor.co.uk